jonithetentmaker

There Is Good News And Bad News

Posted on January 31, 2022 by jonithetentmaker

There is good news and bad news. I am sure you have heard the statement at least once. But good and evil are everyday occurrences in living life, don’t you think? The good news every day is that Jesus Loves You and that you are still alive! Rejoice! The bad news can be numerable things that don’t go your way, including financial, health, and family issues. Are they really that bad?
I recently read that rent is going up, creating a dilemma for those on limited incomes, middle-class and low-income families, and single parents. As inflation soars, so will the cost of living, including rent, food, and gas. What are our legislators thinking? When those who have plenty of money and resources can not find a way to care about those who do not, there is no America, and there is no community. Educated ignorance is the great divide that separates us all! I believe within the next three years; we will see America’s demise. The rich will survive, and the rest of us may become their laborers. We will be providing them with their lavish lifestyles while trying to put food on our tables. Now that is a bad day, month, and year!
But I have heard stories of incredible survival, murmurings of one who can change your life even when the circumstances surrounding you do not change. One who can make a way, open a door, and change the way the powerful and wealthy even think. I am talking about Jesus. There are stories throughout the centuries of those who have withstood the famines, wars, and inflations. They put their complete trust and control in Jesus by giving Him their heart, family, and finances. I am not saying they did not have difficult times or became extremely wealthy. For when we dedicate ourselves to Jesus, we will have tribulations. But, He will be there to go through them with us and show us the way.
So what do you do?
First, you pray to Jesus and ask Him to become Lord of your life. Then inquire about your family, finances, work, and America’s inflation. Maybe if we all pray together regarding America’s inflation, God will open the ears and hearts of our leaders! God will answer you, and it might not be what you want to hear. I always like to tell Him what I want to hear. And I can hear Him from heaven sighing and stating, “Uh, Huh.” Or it may not be in the time frame you desire because it will always be in God’s timing. Which, by-the-way, is the best for us.
Next, pray some more. Make prayer a daily habit. You don’t have to express lofty words or bible verses; make it from the heart. All He wants is your heart to worship and praise Him, and God wants to love you back throughout eternity.

A blessing for you. May God bless you and keep you. May He give you Devine insight during your prayers to help you navigate difficult times and peace knowing He is the one in control! In Jesus Name, Amen!

Who’s Got Your Back

Posted on January 22, 2022January 22, 2022 by jonithetentmaker

Have you seen the NFL commercial where they ask repeatedly, “Who’s Got Your Back?” And now they have one asking “Who’s Back Have You Got?” It could be a wonderful world if we had each other’s back in good times and bad!

Jesus tells us that we must love others as we love ourselves. This statement is almost unimaginable today, because there is a plethora of self-love and me-first engulfing our societies. And with the tidal wave of egotistical action and reaction, Evil has been given the green light to run rampant throughout the world. This Evil has assisted man in creating and releasing diseases which now has us on the never-ending merry-go-round of the next variant! And, for the sake of profit, Evil made our environments a dumping ground for trash and turned our surroundings into lethal habitats in which to live. Evil hates his brother so much, would rather kill him than love him.

So, kudos to the NFL for wanting to bring us together in love and understanding instead of strife and hate. Unfortunately, it takes one large organization to step forward today for people and other organizations to decide this is what we should do. We are a bunch of sheep led by social media, television, and news outlets, so the probability of one person being able to accomplish change is doubtful in today’s world. I pray the NFL and other organizations will step up their causes and help the smaller groups to make forward progress to a better world!

Remember Jesus always has your back! Even when you can not see it or believe it when you are going through difficulties, He is there with you! Call out to Him, pray to Him, and never stop believing His love for you!

God Bless You!

Etsy Store Originally Amelia

https://www.etsy.com/listing/1163331485

Happy Thoughts During Difficult Times

Posted on January 10, 2022January 10, 2022 by jonithetentmaker

The bible verse, “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you before you were born I set you apart; I appointed you as a prophet to the nations,” brings to my mind an endearing scene. Because within my mind’s eye, I see Jesus with two little girls sitting on His lap. One of them is me, and the other is my sister Ibiba.

While we are sitting leaning into Jesus and holding each other’s hands, Jesus is telling us an amazing story. The story concerns both of us and the earthly journey we will take one day. Jesus tells us we will be separated for a short time, but not to worry because we will meet up on our earthly journey. And our souls and hearts will recognize one another again.

Pretty amazing imagination, wouldn’t you say? Maybe, maybe not. I have always seen this place with Jesus while growing up. And when I met Ibiba in Fulshear, Texas, she completed the picture. I am sure any Psychiatrist would tell you it is a displaced childhood memory formed through church attendance and daydreams of a little girl. Except my family was only CEO’s, Christmas and Easter Only when it came to church. As I became older, going to church stopped entirely.

Whatever it is, this thought brings me immense comfort and joy!

Have you ever found peace, comfort, or joy from a thought or a memory? Something that can help to carry you through the difficult days. And it does not necessarily have to be a bible verse or a vision of Jesus. For some, it is the outdoor experience of nature, the sound of a rushing river, or the ocean’s waves slapping the shore.

As 2022 has begun, we do not see the relief some have expected in their lives. Covid is nowhere near going away, just mutating and traveling back around the block again. Jobs with higher pay can’t balance the cost of commodities or housing. And America’s government officials are back to business as usual which is their corrupt monkey business ways.

Has any or all of this touched your lives? If so, I sympathize with you.
My suggestion would be to find your memory, thought, or location and spend time meditating on it each day. Then, take deep breaths in and out and start thanking God for all that you are grateful for in your life. It’s funny how a little quiet gratitude and joyful thoughts can help you make it through another day in this crazy world!

Blessing For You! “God Bless You and Keep You. May His face shine upon you. May you know His love, joy, and peace each day! In Jesus Name, Amen!”

This is my latest t-shirt design at my Etsy Shop, Originally Amelia. I also made one for men too.

https://www.etsy.com/listing/1140524356/fun-kindness-womens-graphic-t-shirt?click_key=84b095d596803dd1cf9f6013482f31f96b8f580d%3A1140524356&click_sum=1331a9b1&ref=shop_home_active_1

Peeking Out My Tent Flap, One More Time

Posted on October 5, 2021 by jonithetentmaker

As the pandemic raged on and with the ever-changing guidelines, we decided to do what we thought best to keep our family safe. Didn’t you do the same? So, part of our garage became a decontamination zone. Being careful meant showering after going out and utilizing pick-up and delivery. Clorox and Lysol became our pantry’s mainstay. And, our daily existence changed, as did everyone else.

The world kept moving forward, with death tolls rising. Covid began in a controlled laboratory, and it was taking full advantage of its newfound freedom. My mind raced again during this time. Was it a controlled laboratory? Or was it a way of genocide that got out of hand? Maybe Covid was a test to see how other countries react to a pandemic and where their vulnerabilities lie. Not only was my mind racing to the outer edges of conspiracies, but the output of public information was more erroneous than truthful. Who were we to believe? I found it necessary to become a scientific researcher and utilize my logical brain for making decisions concerning Covid. I closed my social media apps and turned off the news.

It was during this time that I was reminded in Acts 17:11, even the bible says to find out for yourself, do your due diligence! And for those of you who did, I commend you. And for those of you who glued yourself to social media, news outlets, and other erroneous outlets, it is time you learn how to research, discover and think for yourself.

Acts 17:11 King James Version

“These were nobler than those in Thessalonica, in that they received the word with all readiness of mind and searched the scriptures daily, whether those things were so.”

I did find it funny and sad that some Americans still had their “American” way about them during this disastrous time. Self-centeredness and blatant, vicious retaliation at those who did conform to safety protocols were seen daily. Aren’t we free in America to make decisions concerning ourselves and our families? Covid showered a bright spotlight on the truth of our self-centeredness, randomness, and nothingness, which is so rampant in America today. I would even call them the idols of our century.

I asked myself more than once, “Why, oh why does God put up with America and not smite us down like Sodom and Gomorrah?” I can answer that question. It is because we still support Israel, and one day we will stop doing so. The smiting will come if it is not already happening. (Sorry, but I love the word smite!)

I am lowering the flap of my tent.

So, if God tells us to utilize the brains He gave us, why have we become so lazy in that area of our lives? Is it easier to live in lies than truth? Did the pandemic create a covering of fear which helped to progress social media’s agendas, brought out the liars, and propaganda spreaders to ensure its’ stranglehold on the people of the world? Yes and Yes!

But we can take this disease by the tail and shake it hard. We can find a way to live our lives harmoniously with one another and the disease. It is all about living our truths daily for ourselves, our families, and our communities. Respect and kindness should be the attitudes toward one another. And realizing that what is our truth may not be someone else’s truth. And that is ok!

This is going to be an interesting journey as to where we will head. Society and the landscape of most countries will be altered because of Covid. But never forget the One who is in control! If you are anxious, fearful, or have decisions to make, go to Him. He is waiting to comfort you, guide you, and love you through all times in your life!

God Bless You!

I designed a T-shirt to go with my post in my Etsy Store, thetentmakersshop.com.

https://www.etsy.com/your/shops/TheTentMakersShop/tools/listings/1082258958

Peaking Out From The Flap Of My Tent, Part One

Posted on September 21, 2021 by jonithetentmaker

I keep asking myself, “Why would I even step outside my tent these days?” They say Covid is under control and the new variant is no big deal. Really? People are throwing their masks off, forgetting social distance rules, and the worst part is not washing their hands! Yuk! Eww! And double yuk! Because our leaders did not initiate proper precautions, we found ourselves in a lockdown situation. And now, with vaccinations, everyone has decided it is business as usual, which means winter could be another lockdown. I am sure that my proud and bold Americans will bully on through, independent and belligerent to the end. By the way, the numbers are going back up.

Yep, it is time to put the flap back down.

I don’t know whether it was a bat or a governmental rat that allowed Covid 19 to encompass the world. What I do know is the world woke from a sleepy slumber in January 2020 and found itself at war. Not sure if this is how we imagined our next world war, but this is how it came to us. Covid is the new invasive, silent enemy paralyzing nations in a dark world of disease, death, and fear. As our leaders, scientists, and medical communities began developing plans of action and pharmaceutical weapons to combat this unknown factor, we waited, watching death hover over us and stealing our loved ones. But, we soon realized that Covid does not discriminate!

In 2020 medical battlefronts were being frantically established across the world. Our brave healthcare workers and the behind-the-scenes workers like environmental care, morgues, and gravediggers with their PPE apparel, began their grievous tasks of trying to save lives, give dignity to the dying and not become sick themselves. So you can find Pandemic truth among our frontline workers, not the six o’clock news.

During this stressful time, so many questions encompassed my mind in the beginning. How were we to fight this invisible enemy? And could we conquer it? Or would the world and America’s landscape be forever changed? My mind raced with questions and questions, building my anxiety levels because those in charge appeared more like educated guessers than knowledgeable Scientists, Doctors, and Leaders.

My confidence plummeted when realizing what this disease could do, hit home hard, especially our home. My husband is the only healthy person in our house, and the words “high-risk” now had a new meaning. I have the auto-immune disease Wegeners/GPA along with the six other conditions it has created over the past forty-eight years. And if that was not enough on my plate, our twenty-five-year-old son started exhibiting arthritic and chronic fatigue symptoms when he was twenty. The doctors are still trying to diagnose him with either the Wegeners, Beschets, or a variation of other diseases. Treatments had to be paused, virtual doctor visits were needed, and quarantining meant staying inside our house.

Me being me, I began to consider how much red duct tape it would take to wrap around my house. And an obtrusive, large warning sign stating, “High-Risk Zone, Stay Away!” in the front yard. Or we could place barbed wire across our front yard with the sign “Beware, Explosive Situation!” I seriously thought about the extremes it might take to keep us safe. Maybe not the duct tape or the barbed wire, but the distancing, hygiene to the extreme, mask and glove-wearing IF we were to go out.

I kept reminding myself that God is in control and wore my knees out praying for our family and others who had their family members serving or were already sick.

Maybe I can lift my flap a little bit.

To be continued…

Afghan Women’s Robotic Team Opening Doors

Posted on August 23, 2021 by jonithetentmaker

I am sure everyone knows what is going on in Afghanistan with the Taliban taking over since America decided to pull out. Being that the Taliban are fundamental, hard-line Islamists, I worry along with the world that Afghanistan will return to its’ tribal system. A system that honors killing for opposition and women resume slave-like existence. Yep, we are already seeing it unfold in the news now. The Taliban is going house to house and killing people.

Soapbox speech coming next.

America and her allies helped to stabilize the region and assisted all Afghan people to pursue their dreams for a better country, a better life. But we mindlessly sent billions of dollars to the wrong Afghan administrators. We made them wealthy and they were able to flee the country when the Taliban took over. I think we should hunt them down and get our money back! And one more thing I do not understand is that America has bases all over the world, why not leave one in Afghanistan to help the country remain secure. Do not flood their country with our money, they can develop commerce just like the rest of the world! Afghanistan has very valuable resources.

Stepping down from soapbox.

As the Taliban has started searching the homes, one lady was worried about the women on the Afghan Olympic Robotics Team. These are young women, ages 16 to 18, who were studying to be Scientists and Engineers. Their dream of pursuing careers in these respected fields was about to end and maybe along with their lives. Along comes Allyson Reneau, a 60-year-old Harvard graduate with a Master’s degree in international relations and US space policy. She had the knowledge, the means, and a way to get the young ladies out of Afghanistan. But all the right doors had to open, they did, and the window of opportunity was “a now or never” scenario. So it was now! God Bless Allyson Reneau for her fortitude and courage in getting those ladies out! And thank God for providing Allyson, open doors, and windows of opportunities!

I believe God initiated his plan before the young women were born to give the ladies doors of opportunity for education, for meeting the necessary people, and for putting them in Allyson Reneau’s life. And now He has opened the way for them to pursue their dreams and remind us that in the end, we win! (Read Revelation and you will understand Jesus defeating satan/evil.) We all have doors and windows of opportunity in our lives. Some we don’t see until after the fact and some present us with a which way to go predicament. Be sure to pray and allow God to lead your way. God is the real eye and door opener.

Pray for Afghanistan and pray for our own leaders to possess good discernment concerning the volatile situation. Pray for the Afghan Robotics team, for Allyson Reneau, and her family. If ever there was a time to pray it is now! Scientifically the world is slowing down but humanity is reviving up the evil and only God can cover us with His protective hem of His garment!

Heavenly Father,

I come before you to ask that you forgive me of my sins and forgive America for her sins. Father, I ask that you put your hem over the Afghan people and protect them from the evil that has now taken over their country. I ask for wise discernment to be given to our President and those who are his advisors. Open their eyes to the evil they have opened the door for it to go through! I ask all of this in the name of Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior! Amen!

God Bless You!

Surviving The Second Covid Variant Wave

Posted on August 4, 2021 by jonithetentmaker

Is Groundhog Day upon us? Because if you have been reading the news and the latest information on Covid with its new variants, another fall like last year with shutdowns and mandates may be upon us. Can your family survive another pandemic season? I also wonder what position our government will assume? A status of no action with the attitude concerning those who get sick and possibly die, get sick and die? Or will they grow a backbone and tell the American people what they must do to stop Covid completely? And if Americans seem not to be able to comply, then mandate it as law? What am I saying…our government and a backbone?

Ok, enough picking on our government. My groundhog does resemble some of our officials.

What are you doing right now to buffer yourself, your family, and humanity from another Covid season? I was vaccinated, and I wear my mask when I go out and make a few trips out as possible. If I can protect someone else by wearing a mask, it is no big deal to me. Of course, washing hands is an OCD area for me. It grosses me out when someone does not wash their hands in the bathroom. Don’t they realize they have “potty germs” on them and then on everything they touch? Yuk! Washing your hands will definitely save humanity!

Next question, how is your mental health? Are you able to function every day, or has all of this beaten you down? If you feel overwhelmed, please seek help. Whether it is a best friend to confide in, a Pastor, or a Therapist, do not let the circumstances take control of your life! Ya’ll know me; I go to the Lord. And some of you would laugh to hear my prayers. They are not formal, flowery, or repetitive religious prayers. I envision myself as a child climbing up on my Father’s lap and then laying my head against His shoulder. Snuggling in, I begin to pray. When it is Jesus and me, I see and know my Father as the lamb as He was slain. The scars on His face and body are ever before me, and I know the price He paid for me. It makes me very much aware of His love for me. And His reassurance that what I am experiencing today is only temporary gives me the strength and hope to move forward in life.

Of course, when I pray for others, it is different. Because that is when I come before Jesus’ throne, I lie prostrate before Him. It is an audience with the King, and He is The King. I give to Jesus my petitions with His words and promises attached. I humble myself as low as I can and pray fervently for those on my prayer list. Also, I thank Him for answered prayer, even if He did not answer it my way.

I will pray for you; email me. All prayer is confidential. Prayer is the greatest gift to give and receive! This world needs prayer! Prayer is…

For some, the journey we call life can be extremely tough, while others breeze right on through. And the second wave of Covid variants may be a struggle for you, your family, and your friends. I have a few suggestions that might help all of us survive and thrive this next year. First, you can set up a “check-in” session by inviting a small group over each week, sitting around a fire, talking, and maybe adding a little prayer. Second, run errands for those who can not or should not go out, have a text chain, spread love, hope, and kindness to as many people as you can during the day. Third, pray for those you see each day and do not know who are homeless and begging for money. And when you begin to feel drained, go somewhere quiet and sit with the Lord. He wants to love on you too!

I know our world has become uncertain and frighteningly violent. Which to those of us who study the bible, it is not a surprise. In the days before Jesus comes to take His church back to heaven, read the book of Revelation, these events will begin to happen. It is how we endure this time that is so important. We can be servants, or we can be served. I want to be the servant! What about you?

Comments are appreciated, vulgarity deleted!

God Bless You!

Romans 8:28 or Difficult Times

Posted on July 21, 2021 by jonithetentmaker

“And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to His purpose for them.” Romans 8:28

I think God is trying to tell me something because Romans 8:28 keeps popping up everywhere I read, listen to, or go to today. K-love sent it to my email and Dr. Missler, even though the study is Genesis, told us to bookmark Romans 8:28. Then he read Romans 8 out loud and told us how important this section is concerning our covenant with God.

In layman’s terms, the verse states that the good, bad, and ugly journeys of our lives can be worked out for the good of God and us. So, we have to believe it and allow God to be the one in control! And, we also need to sit still and listen with our ears. So very important. Some very difficult attributes to attain and keep, especially for me.

Right now, as a family, we are in a traffic circle with different avenues we can pursue. It concerns our finances, my health, our son’s health, and our future. We have been praying and waiting for God to answer, which is extremely difficult for me. I want instant answers and instant results. So, I have to be especially careful not to allow Satan to push my buttons and cause me to charge ahead into my wants only and not my family’s decision. The stress, for me, is unsurmountable while I hold the reins tight on myself. And I find myself praying in my head and out loud throughout the day, trying to keep it together.

Maybe that is why God sent me Romans 8:28 today. He has heard my prayers and I need to hold on while He is making the way, opening the doors, and clearing the pathways. A little reassurance for one of His more difficult kids.

If you or your family is going through difficult times, bookmark Romans 8:28. Pray, God hears your prayers and answers them!

God Bless You!

The Rainbow!

Posted on July 8, 2021 by jonithetentmaker

The other day, while standing outside at our daughter’s house, the sky became heavy with dark storm clouds. Myself, my husband, daughter, son-in-law, and our three grandkids watched as the storm approached, while enduring the hot, oppressive air. Typical for a summer afternoon rainstorm in the South. And then a breeze drifted down, wrapping us in a crisp, refreshing, rain-scented wave. I could feel my body releasing a satisfying Ahh from deep inside. Finally, the rain began to pour down.

We quickly took shelter under the edge of their garage and watched as our grandchildren delightfully danced in and out of the wet droplets. Then, as the storm began to pass by, there it was, right in front of us, The Rainbow! Not just any rainbow, but a vibrant, glistening show of color with a secondary one coming up behind it. And to our amazement, we could see one end to the other. I mean, where it touched the ground on both sides! If I had not been so mesmerized by the rainbow, I should have jumped in the car and drove to at least one end! But, of course, the idea did not occur to me until later the next day.

The picture below shows the rainbow from end to end. Unfortunately my husband’s iphone does not display the magnificent colors.

As we stood there basking in God’s promise, I was overwhelmed by the fact that “ God keeps His promises,” “God says what He means and means what He says,” and that His love for us is so great, He signs His commitment to us with His fingerprints! And His fingerprints are everywhere in the universe if we take the time to notice!!

Yes, I am overwhelmed with holy excitement!

Sometimes in life, we need a rainbow to knock our socks off and remind us Who we belong to and that we are only visitors in this world. Psalm 19: 1-4 tells us about God’s earthly reminders that He is the Creator and we are the creation. And His love for us is bigger than the universe He created for us!

Notice the part where it states that “God has pitched a tent for the sun?” I had to leave that verse in too.

Psalm 19:1-4

The heavens declare the glory of God;

The skies proclaim the work of his hands.

Day after day, they pour forth speech;

Night after night, they reveal knowledge.

They have no speech; they use no words;

No sound is heard from them.

Yet their voice goes out into the all the earth,

Their words to the ends of the world.

In the heavens, God has pitched a tent for the sun.

It is like a bridegroom coming out of his chamber,

Like a champion rejoicing to run his course.

It rises at one end of the heavens

And makes it circuit to the other,

Nothing is deprived of its warmth.

Do you know that God has His fingerprints on you? He does! He loves you more than you will ever know. So go and find other reminders God has placed in your world to show you that He is there with you!

God Bless You!

I’M BACK! My Sight is Restored

Posted on June 30, 2021 by jonithetentmaker

I never realized that having cataracts removed from both of my eyes would catapult my Van Gogh vision into clear Kodak moments! Since cataracts are gradual, you do not realize how much of your vision you are losing. I thought everything was fine and waiting on the surgery would not be a big deal. Looking back, I see a strain on my whole family, with my husband becoming my chauffeur and our son my texting assistant. And toward the end of the cataract invasion, I became the perfect enactment of a “cartoon old lady” by bumbling around, squinting, and placing objects almost on my eyeballs to identify them. Who needs cataract surgery? Then the day came when I could no longer recognize my keyboard or the letters on my computer screen, and writing in longhand across a page resembled intersecting lines. Surgery Please! Five years later.

Yes, the “old lady” is coming out in me. I see her every day in my mirror with my new corrected vision and notice her butting in on my decisions and actions. I am too young for cataract removal and old lady syndrome, but there she is squarely in front of me, staring back. Maybe with my cataracts removed, she will go away!

Unfortunately, my cataracts are disease-related from all of the years of steroids utilized to keep the GPA in temporary remission. But why wait so long on such a simple procedure? Maybe I could not bear the thought of one more surgical procedure and one more hit to our finances. Yes, we have health insurance through my husband’s job, but nothing is 100%. And with my infinite number of doctor visits, within my extensive catalog of physicians I have acquired, there are still co-pays and medical bills to be paid.

I should not complain, think of myself as unfortunate or resent the old lady staring back at me. There was a time in my life when I was a single parent, working for an hourly wage and with no health insurance. Those were some tough years because I strove not to be on assistance. So, being a single parent and paying our way meant my meals were infrequent, and I ate many a can of Spaghetti-0s. You could get those four for a dollar! But my children had everything they needed, and that was what kept me pushing forward every day. It may have been what kept me alive! I carry memories like these within my mind’s eye to help remind me just how blessed I am today! It also gives me empathy concerning single, hourly wage parents with the same struggles I have known.

I believe we are here to learn lessons and to try to be better people. By now, I should have acquired at least four or five PhDs. Lessons we see with our eyes and within our memories should help us move forward in life. And when you get that nagging feeling like you have been there before and it was a disaster…walk away!

The Apostle Paul had a physical sight impairment, and his memory sight must have been pretty horrific when he chose to follow Christ because of the torture and imprisonment he endured. He knew his destiny and passionately followed it until the end. One of Paul’s comments I wished I had learned early in my life is Philippians 4:11.

“I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances.”

I wish I could have said that during my past journeys.

What did I learn this time from my journey of sight to no sight and back to sight again? First, not wait for needed surgeries and graciously, not grumpily, depend on others for assistance and prayers. Second is the sanctity to have sight and not to have sight. Third, I learned to go deeper into my study of the bible, thanks to Audible and Chuck Missler, which brought me to a greater dependence on Jesus Christ and to know Him more.

We all have struggles in life, some of us more than others, and we must remember that when interacting with people. We don’t know what they are going through or went through in life which brought them to the place they are today. And it is how we see them and ourselves, either with our eyes or with our heart, that will make the difference.

If you are having some difficult times right now, step back and try to get a new view of the situation. Finding someone you trust to talk to and pray with will help you. And know as I know that God loves you!